If you’re not clear on how to address relationship impasses around sex, you’re certainly not alone. Sex is still a sensitive, secretive topic, and many couples just aren’t given the tools to resolve their sexual difficulties. Working with me means having support in navigating these tender, vulnerable discussions. I also strive to help people move through the fears they have when it comes to talking about sex.
My approach to working with clients is holistic, culturally-informed, and relational. Sex therapy isn’t just about talking about sex. Instead, I treat you both as whole people with rich experiences and thought processes. In this work, I always consider how various relationships, values, and identities shape who you are. While every course of treatment is unique, you can expect the following from couples therapy:
Identify realistic goals: During the first part of therapy, we’ll collaboratively discuss what you’d both like to see changed. We’ll also explore how the current issues are affecting your relationship satisfaction. Having this roadmap ensures that we’re all on the same page for your treatment.
Challenge problematic sex myths: Both individuals and couples sometimes have damaging stereotypes about what sex should (or shouldn’t) look like. Couples therapy often entails addressing these detrimental myths to help develop healthier belief systems.
Receive direct feedback: There’s often a trial-and-error component associated with couples therapy. You and your partner will be instructed to try new things, and you’ll come back to our sessions talking about your experience doing them. My goal is to monitor your progress and provide you both with ongoing guidance to ensure you’re working toward your relationship goals.
Practice real-time methods for healthy communication: It’s no secret that poor communication can cause or worsen sex problems. That said, conflict resolution isn’t necessarily intuitive, and you may have not been taught how to really build a healthy relationship. My couples therapy aims to help you both truly listen and talk to one another.
Increase self-acceptance: If you don’t accept yourself, it’s so hard to trust your body or feel secure in your relationship. Valuing who you are allows you to bring new confidence to everything you do, including sex.
Honor your sexual wants: No matter what they are, your sexual wants matter. Even if your wants don’t match the other person’s, they should not be shamed, suppressed, or avoided. Ideally, in couples therapy, you and your partner can come together to strengthen your sexual relationship.