Individual Therapy

ONE

Individual Therapy

survivor
[\sər-ˈvī-vər\ noun] : a person who continues to function or prosper in spite of opposition, hardship, or setbacks.
If you had to figure out a lot from an early age, but still can’t shake old patterns despite your success, I want to know more.
You did it! You achieved more in life than you thought you could or would. Where you came from and what you’ve experienced has made you into a survivor. And yet, you feel yourself stuck in your personal life. Whatever progress you’ve gained didn’t bring you the keys to happiness you were expecting. You’re attracting the same people you thought you could avoid. All the ways you had to cope from a tough childhood are still around and keep haunting you.

How much of the following is YOU?
• You are the one taking care of other people and situations.
• You read people better than most and have a hard time trusting people.
• There’s always a fuzzy feeling the “other shoe is going to drop” at any time, and you always need to be prepared.
• You can stay in an uncomfortable, even shitty, situation long term. In spite of that, you’ll settle enough to not rock the boat.
• You cling to being hyper-independent while you’re overworked.
• It’s hard to know your wants, or conclude you’re just being too sensitive when you do know what you want.
• Deep down you wonder if you can get the kind of love you want.
• One way you deal with life is by having a “secret self” – where other parts of you can’t be seen or touched.
• Your fantasy world is rich and deep.

Clients come to me for individual therapy because they want to make links between what happened before and how it impacts them now. Often these folks are intelligent and hardworking, but are falling apart in how to take care of themselves and have healthy relationships. Their true wants and actual feelings may be hard to locate, especially to themselves. Scarcity or instability in the early years is common. Some clients ID their parents or caregivers as having narcissistic traits, not having enough resources to go around, substance abuse problems, or untreated mental illness.
What I do with clients is help to define what their goals are right now. With a little bit of TLC and honesty, we start identifying which patterns keep playing out in different areas of your life.  At times, there is a mistrust that anything was that “all that bad” anyway, or perhaps “it’s just in my head.” Without having to blame others, you’ll find out where you are stuck, honor your resilience, and how to start living a life that is nourishing and real.
If you have a sense something needs to shift, now is the moment to take a risk. You don’t have to figure it all out on your own. Contact me to book free a consultation.
*I have special interest in working with multiethnic and biracial clients. I welcome clients across the gender and sexuality spectrum.
“It is a joy to be hidden and a disaster not to be found.” – D.W. Winnicott
Deva is a psychotherapist practicing in the downtown Financial District of San Francisco, CA (LMFT #103816). She has worked with clients aged 6 to 88 in different settings since 2011. These days, she helps individuals and couples get more in tune with their wants and needs. She has a special focus on sexuality and folks of mixed ethnic or racial backgrounds.

She slightly prefers pie over cake, but loves dogs and cats equally.
582 Market St., San Francisco, CA 94104 · 415-496-6660

© Deva Segal, SF Therapist. All rights reserved. 2021